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Self-Help

Make Every Day a Self-Love Day – #Valentines

5 TipsTowardsSelf-Love

It was Valentine’s Day yesterday. I happen to love the day, I don’t get people who hate on it. Yes, you don’t have to say I love you only on Valentine’s Day and there is nothing sweeter than small surprise gifts or acts of kindness throughout the year. But in a world that is so full of hate (and love!), why get annoyed about a day that is celebrating love? I don’t get it. Even if you’re single there is still love in your life. Perhaps there’s love for your family, your pets, the view, your favourite show, and god forbid, YOURSELF!

Self-love is important for your happiness. Who knows what’s going to happen in life, but if you love yourself and treat yourself with care, you will get through it all.

Loving yourself is sometimes seen as a bad thing. My daughter won’t ever admit she is good at something because it’s not the thing to do. You’re seen as being big-headed or arrogant if you recognise your worth. So sad. I try to explain that you can love yourself without being an egotistical maniac. When someone pays you a compliment just accept it with grace. Say thank you and pay a compliment back. Don’t deny it, even if you don’t truly believe it at that time. And that is something that we can all work on doing to boost our self-esteem, self-worth and mental health. Paying ourselves compliments and accepting them, even if you’re not fully convinced at the start.

Working Towards Self-Love

Negatives are everywhere, in the media, in other people and in us. But positivity and love is out there too, sometimes it’s just harder to see and to feel. We can start with ourselves and begin sending out love and positivity into the world to benefit us on a personal and mental health level and to benefit the people around us, even those strangers in the streets.  Here are a few tips on how to start the self-love journey if you’re in need of a push in the right direction.

  1. Work to introduce positivity into your thoughts. Actively say positive things about yourself and your day rather than focusing on the negatives. Start by picking between 1-5 positive things about yourself each and every day – before bed or in the shower, wherever you want, just say them in your head or write them down if you prefer and don’t deny them. Don’t add phrases like ‘I wish’ or ‘As if’. Say a positive sentence ‘My hair is super soft today’ or ‘I love the colour of my eyes’ or perhaps ‘I worked really hard today and did a good job’ and leave the thoughts there in your brainwaves.
  2. Repeat the step above every single day – you can repeat the same sentences or add some new ones, just do it everyday and make it a habit. It gets easier in time and niggly doubts about what you’re saying begin to become less frequent. You gradually begin accepting the positivity into your life.
  3. Smile when you’re on your own, even when you’re so not feeling a smile. I’m not saying ignore your blues and fight back tears – cry and explore those emotions but don’t ignore the power of a smile either. Smiling releases endorphins, those amazing happy hormones that do us some good in the old mental health arena. The endorphins are released each time you smile, so do it more and do it when you’re not feeling your best. If you need help turn to things that make you smile, spend time playing with the kiddie winks, watch something funny, look for memes online, play a video game. Or simply sit down on your bed and smile! Just do it! Oh, and smile at other people too!
  4. Start a positive notebook. A Twitter friend of mine decided to keep a positive notebook and I think this is such an amazing idea, especially for visual people. Sometimes saying the positive things in your head isn’t quite enough. Writing them down for you to revisit or even meditate on can be so helpful.
  5. Negative thoughts may still creep into your mind; they can be persistent little buggers. Just because they come in doesn’t mean they can take over. Begin practicing pushing out the negative thoughts and replacing them with positive ones. This is something I have worked hard on over the past couple of years and gradually you’ll find the negativity is a far less frequent visitor, hurray!

So those are my five little steps to take towards positive self-love – they’ve helped me make big changes in myself and perhaps they’ll do the same for anyone else struggling like I was.

Make every day a day where you celebrate love in your life.

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Nettie

24 Comments

  1. Sophie

    Absolutely agree with all of this. Our relationships with ourselves are our longest relationships. They deserve the most work!

    15 . Feb . 2016
  2. Miss Kitty Kaos

    I fully agree that self love every day is so important and we need to embrace ourselves first X

    15 . Feb . 2016
  3. Fashion and Style Police

    Lovely post. Thanks for sharing this post. Self love is so important.

    15 . Feb . 2016
  4. Roxie

    I totally agree. Valentine’s Day should be about celebrating love and positivity through small acts of kindness. I was shocked at how bitter my timeline was on Twitter yesterday.

    15 . Feb . 2016
  5. Zoe L

    Lovely post. Self Love is important too.

    15 . Feb . 2016
  6. Dannii @ Hungry Healthy Happy

    I love all of these and I totally agree. It’s so important that we learn to love ourselves and that we are kinder to ourselves.

    15 . Feb . 2016
  7. Nayna Kanabar

    Self love is really important so many of us forget that.Great post.

    15 . Feb . 2016
  8. Emma White

    what a lovely post and its so true although it took me many years to learn

    15 . Feb . 2016
  9. StressedMum

    Great post, everyone has to learn to love themselves x

    15 . Feb . 2016
  10. Rhian Westbury

    I agree that it is a day for all kinds of love, not just romantic love x

    15 . Feb . 2016
  11. Ana De- Jesus

    This is something I need to put in practice going forward as I struggle with this a lot!

    15 . Feb . 2016
  12. Liz Mays

    I like the idea of keeping a positive notebook. That would really help keep things in perspective.

    15 . Feb . 2016
  13. Kacie

    I like Valentine’s Day too. Whether you’re single or in a relationship, I think the key is just not taking it too seriously 🙂

    16 . Feb . 2016
  14. Tara | C&CO.

    I love these prompts, self-love is so important.

    http://www.cattitudeandco.uk

    16 . Feb . 2016
  15. Ickle Pickle

    Brilliant post – all so true. It is really hard to do, but loving yourself really is the beginning of everything. Kaz x

    16 . Feb . 2016
  16. Rebecca Smith

    A great post. Self love is something I have taken years to learn x

    16 . Feb . 2016
  17. Leanne

    This is such a lovely post. I probably don’t love myself as much as I should. This needs to change!

    16 . Feb . 2016
  18. Jenny Eaves

    A fab post, personal positivity is an important thing! 🙂 x

    17 . Feb . 2016
  19. Idaintyit

    I don’t valentines day but I don’t celebrate it either, we have never really seen the point in it. Self love however I totally agree with

    17 . Feb . 2016
  20. Tanya Brannan

    Totally hit the nail on the head! We can all be so self critical that its hard to see the good points. I am a big fan of self love Tx

    17 . Feb . 2016
  21. rachel

    I agree, self love is really important so many of us forget that, me for one x

    17 . Feb . 2016
  22. Mandi

    Lovely post, we can’t expect our children to love themselves if we don’t follow the same set of rules and lead by example xx

    18 . Feb . 2016
  23. Tori Gabriel

    You are absolutely right. Loving yourself is frowned upon; it seems to be normal to run yourself down. Great tips.

    23 . Feb . 2016
  24. Jenny

    Great post, it saddens me that we never seem able to focus on the positives – something I am working on with my own children.

    24 . Feb . 2016

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